Talking about your feelings lifts a weight from your shoulders. But she swears she is fine when the opposite is true, because she doesn’t want to cause a problem. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering is a big comfort for me. When you can't find someone to talk to, it can be painful. Talking to someone about how you’re feeling can help you sort through your feelings, put things in perspective, and release tension. The problem is bottling up our emotions isn’t a natural or healthy state to be in. If your partner is in the middle of sharing his or her feelings, be attentive and don't try and steal spotlight. I have found it really hard to talk to someone about how I feel, my counselor would ask me how I'm feeling and I always say good even if I'm angers or sad. It's okay to start off by saying you have been going through a tough time. If the first two tips don’t quite do the trick, “play a game and just talk naturally about something in your past that made you sad, angry, or happy,” as recommended by McCoy. An active listener is waiting to listen you. That’s not to say it’s all going to be plane-sailing – but in the long run it’s going to feel like a massive weight you didn’t even know you were carrying has been lifted. Understandably, you would want to vent to a friend or loved one about what you're experiencing. Being in touch with our emotions (AKA emotional intelligence) is important because our feelings are important indicators for what’s happening in life. Many people worry that once they start, they won’t be able to stop (which is never the case). Talking can be a way to cope with a problem you’ve been carrying around in your head for a while. People will listen and give you support if you let them know how you're feeling. If you need to talk to someone right now, free call Samaritans on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.ie. Get the latest advice about COVID-19. Describe the degree of your feelings—are you furious or mildly irritated? I feel very lonely and depressed about things I've experienced/never done. The person they trust more than anything. I need the title of this song it went like “and she will” that’s all I really remember and it also said something along the lines of she will go free or something in that nature. Communicate effectively in your relationships. The tendency to invalidate and suppress our feelings has become part of our culture. The answers are, as with most things in psychology, both simple and complicated. As much as others care, you are the one who ultimately has to handle your challenges. Your therapist will never push you to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about or rush the process in a way that overwhelms you. Find the right moment for the conversation as you want to have time to talk and not be interrupted. page last reviewed: 23/09/2018next review due: 23/09/2021. The chances are, if we struggle to talk about our feelings as adults it’s because we were never provided the space to do so as children. Samaritans are available 24 hours a day. Even being in other people's company can help. Talking about your feelings is a sign of personal strength. Did you feel like you could talk to them when you were angry or you felt misunderstood? By clicking “Accept All Cookies” you can agree to the use of all cookies. From there, try to empathize as much as you can. I want to talk to someone about my feelings. You’re not expected (or designed) to be battling everything out alone. We might try all kinds of strategies to try and suppress our emotions – numbing ourselves with alcohol and drugs, keeping ourselves so busy we don’t have time to think or process our thoughts and feelings… But again, none of these work in the long-term. April 16, 2020 April 17, 2020 Typography by Igor. Any insomnia or other issues? Let’s take a closer look at why it’s so important to express our emotions. Get matched to a psychologist, and have your first therapy session the same day. Talking about it helps me to process the situation, and it … Not everyone finds it easy to talk about how they feel. When you talk about your feelings, it also might help to: 1. Just a couple quick questions before I transfer you. Describe what's happened, how you feel and the help you need. Communication is key to any relationship, and talking about your feelings is going to make you both a better person and partner. "Sharing your feelings in a relationship is essential to building mutual trust, safety and respect — if you are able to share your emotions without feeling ashamed or … Why should I talk to someone about my feelings? Maybe you wonder why they’re being so sensitive or intense, and can’t just “get on with it”. It’s part of taking charge of your wellbeing and doing what you can to stay healthy. I Wish I Had Someone To Talk To About My Problems. How we feel impacts how we behave. You might find it hard to talk to others about your feelings and experiences. Everyone needs a listening ear sometimes. Validating feelings involves recognizing someone's feelings and acknowledging them as important. If you communicate your feelings to them, people are often willing to help out a friend in need. Have you ever wondered if you’re just one of those people who doesn’t have feelings? They build up quietly in the background… And soon enough, they start shouting at us – until we’re forced to take notice. Simply giving someone space to talk, and listening to how they're feeling, can be really helpful in itself. You might find it easier to start the conversation when you are doing something else. In the short-term, suppressing our feelings might mean overreacting in situations. Doctor's Assistant: The Psychologist can help. If we’re not in touch with our feelings, we’re going to find it a struggle to form close relationships. Some of us literally have no one to vent to, but feeling alone isn’t defined by how many people are physically surrounding you. Confide in someone you trust such as your partner, a family member, a friend or neighbour. We would also like to set optional cookies (analytical, functional and YouTube) to enhance and improve our service. It might also help the people you care about. For example, you can say, “I wasn’t happy whenever I didn’t receive your part of the project and I had to turn in my work late.” Since communication works both ways, remember to give whoever you're talking … Start by listening and responding in simple terms. You don't need any special training to show someone you care about them. I can't STAND crying in front of people. While you’re talking, try to be as clear as possible by explaining the situation and how it made you feel. We’re social creatures, and we all need support. You can opt-out of these cookies. Very often just saying something out loud to another person can offer a huge release. I know that towards the end of the song the singer says the “and she will” part like 3 times in a row. I don't like feelings. If you’ve spent a lot of time trying to suppress your feelings, you might find that it feels very overwhelming when you actually do express them. If you feel very out of touch with your emotions this can often be traced back to childhood. Emotions tell us exactly what we need to hear (even if sometimes it’s not what we necessarily want to hear). Maybe we avoid authentic connections because they feel scary or we form friendships and relationships that are “surface level” in order to feel safe. It enables you to form authentic connections. When we’re out of touch with our feelings, we allow them to rule over us. 2. Let them know you are not okay. You do a good enough job at keeping them down – so why can’t they? No one calls me. Even though we might feel a certain way one moment, it will never last forever.